Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Finding a happy balance ♥

Realities really seem to be a struggle lately and even writing those first few words really aren't accurate because the struggles have been on going for almost a year! It must be due to her outgrowing the baby years and into a child. Why am I having such a hard time with the reality of having a child with disabilities?! Is it my faith that I believe a miracle could happen? Is it the HOPE that one day she could be healed on this earth? Bottom line is that my child is disabled and cognitively severely delayed!! I need to find a happy balance not only for me, but for my family. It seems like I must have posted something similar to this in the recent past. Maybe it is because I feel like I am waking up on groundhog day everyday, same routines with the same appointments, week after week after week. Ugh, okay off my soapbox now...

We are gearing up for our Atlanta trip to our appointment with Mylee's geneticist. We still have a lot to prepare for. It is difficult traveling with someone who has more equipment and other items than most. For instance, we need to pack a single tent to enclose Mylee in at night since she is too big for a pack n play crib yet we need to keep her confined to a small space due to her being a fall risk. It really gives new meaning to packing everything including the kitchen sink! I will need to touch base with her geneticist office to make sure they have all new records from out last local admission and to find out if they have received her results from the spinal tap. Unfortunately, we will not have the results from a scheduled ERG/VER that we were hoping to have completed before our trip.

We had a little snag in our attempt to have a procedure done in a local hospital that we are not too familiar with. Currently, only one hospital in Arizona conducts this procedure for pediatric patients. An active investigation is being conducted on the technician who seemed to be under the influence of something. We stopped the procedure not only due to this unfortunate circumstance but because Mylee was also being very uncooperative and somewhat combative. We thought we were going to be transported to UCLA to have the procedure done under sedation, however our local Children's hospital will be able to conduct the procedure later in the summer. Mylee will also be scheduled for another VEEG. We are checking to see if she is having seizures. Mylee's disease seems to have progressed since her last MRI showing both continued progression of atrophy in her cerebellum and now delayed mylination in the cerebral hemispheres. This makes her more susceptible of having seizures. We are anxious to discuss these findings as well with her geneticist to see if she could help us better understand what is happening with Mylee.

Finding a happy balance in everyday life is difficult, finding a happy balance in our life is almost impossible! I have a child who wants to walk, who wants to eat, who tries to keep up with her little sister but struggles in every way, shape and form. It honestly is heartbreaking! So we do what we can and make the best of every situation. Mylee has been working on power chair training for about 3 months now and we have to the conclusion that we need to hold off with continuing training with her chair. We will discuss getting a manual chair for Mylee and use the manual chair for her independence. And hopefully in a year or two we can try again with the power chair. We have seen a lot of neurological changes in Mylee and we will remain HOPEful that she can overcome these obstacles that continue to be thrown in her direction. ♥


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